“It’s so hot. I’m so depleted. I feel like a snail creeping around an activist’s sweaty Doc Marten.”
… , …
I don’t recall where I read those lines long ago, but the message and imagery has stuck with me, and now I know the feeling.
It’s hot, in the range of 30C / 90F plus-hot. I haven’t lived anywhere hot in a long time, and I’m finding it hard to focus. To concentrate. To get things done.
I don’t quite feel like myself, nor act like who I think I am: a committed hard-working person who competently juggles multiple projects. Who is this person who naps in the middle of the afternoon? This person who goes to look up one tiny detail on the Internet and 3 hours later discovers she’s just watched two episodes of “La que se avecina” (What’s yet to come) and is considering a third. When I’m being generous with myself I view watching this series as important “pop culture self-education” but 1, 2, 3, … episodes in the middle of the afternoon, and after the nap(!) is just laziness and addiction to nonsense.
time to think
But the heat has given me lots of time to lie around and think and I’ve been thinking about my art and re-occurring images or symbols there. It’s something that was opened up by a conversation with Hallelujah Truth when she was here in May.
I’m not entirely sure what I’ll find, and considering the heat and my overwhelming mental lethargy, my hope is that it gives me access to thoughts that are usually buried in busyness and distractions.
Am I right? Let’s see, the first symbol I’m going to take on is “the shadow”. One, because the shadow comes up a lot in my work, and two, maybe it’ll give me some insight into what’s going on with me.
Meanwhile, 4 Fingers from 2015, is also about shadow work without ever using that expression, and the concept (4 fingers) is a good, simple life skill to improve relationships. I hope you enjoy it, and let me know what you think. Comments, please.